How Will I Know?

Individuals “hear” this call in different ways, and not normally as a result of any great vision or revelation! God speaks with a “still, small voice of calm.” Perhaps phrases like “tune into” or “pick out” would be more accurate for most of us. For we have to listen carefully to the Holy Spirit in the depth of our hearts, against a background of a lot of other noise and disturbance.

So, are there some guideposts that help us along the way?  Sure!...here are a few:

Firstly, there are often two indicators that can initially be made out in your discernment. One is negative: a fundamental dissatisfaction with a person’s present life and activities; not because it is bad, but because it just isn’t your true work, however lucrative or highly esteemed by others. You just get a sense that there is something more that you are being called to than what you are presently doing. The other is positive: a definite desire to follow Jesus and do His will, even though it may be unclear for the time being what He wants you to do. In some sense, the very fact you are reading this shows you are already somewhat interested in learning what this “monk” thing is all about.

Secondly, these initial indicators then lead to a series of random thoughts that just keeps bringing you back to thinking about religious life. In other words, you just can't get those thoughts out of your head. You will almost certainly feel hesitant because you're just not quite sure what is going on. As we monks can tell you, you will soon see that we cannot answer the call with our own resources. God is at work, and we are utterly inadequate without His help and encouragement. This is where the Holy Spirit comes in: He helps us answer God’s call. If we want to respond, we must ask for the help of the Holy Spirit. Jesus is always with us too, and He will help us through the sacraments as well as through other people. One of the best ways to listen more deeply to God's calling is to try to spend time before the Blessed Sacrament in prayer. Slowly, you will notice that these random thoughts are not just your mind wandering, but in reality, is the Holy Spirit beginning to churn and work within you. 

Thirdly, these random thoughts start to move to becoming ironic coincidences that just make you laugh. It might be that you are talking with someone and BOOM!, they start talking about monks. It might be you are searching the internet and BOOM!, videos or images or subjects about monastic life keep passing before you even when you have not specifically searched for them. It might be that you are reading a series of articles or books and BOOM!, someone speaks about the monastic life. One monk used to describe this as God repeatedly tapping you on the shoulder and pointing you to monastic life. As one of our more southern monks described it, these coincidences from God are like a deer in the headlights of a car...God has put the spotlight on you and He wants to help guide you. 

Fourthly, these ironic coincidences begin to just beckon you to take the next step and speak with someone...ANYONE! The process of introduction to Subiaco Abbey begins with communication between Brother Ambrose and yourself. In essence, this nudging and urging to consider this way of life just won't go away; you can't shake it! We suggest a visit or two to the abbey. Simply tell Brother that you’d like to talk or learn more about this way of life as a monk. As a regular practice, we are always open to the possibility of visits from those interested in our monastic way of life. You can click on the “Vocation Visit” link to learn more about this. From these visits, you may start to get a better sense that God is not just vaguely leading you to any generic abbey, but giving you a clear invitation to explore this monastic life more deeply at Subiaco. Our monastic life is clearly and qualitatively distinctive from a diocesan way of life, and it is in spending time with us that you will discern if God is inviting you to the communal monastic way of life. We like to be clear with people that our monastic way of life is not easy, but it is filled with joy and an abiding sense of peace that God has called us here. 

Finally, as you make repeated visits and wade through different options for your life (other monastic communities, other religious communities, or diocesan life), you begin to get a series of affirmations that Subiaco is the place God has called for you to explore more deeply. Even as self-doubt, others, or even the Devil, begin to try to dissuade you from your choice to explore monastic life, there are at the same time seemingly strange and clear affirmations that start to come from God that you are taking the right steps towards monastic life. One of our monks recounted that when he was in this process of discernment he suddenly met someone at his church who, out of the blue, starts to talk about Subiaco and meeting monks who inspired her. Another monk shared how he was in the process of discernment and suddenly, out of the blue, he finds a book about Subiaco Abbey in a used bookstore on the rural East Coast as if a clear affirmation that God was calling him to this specific place. Thus, as you begin this process of discernment do NOT think that God will somehow leave you and just watch from afar as you wade through these major decisions for your life. He is with you every step of the way, He will affirm you, and He will not abandon you in this journey to draw closer to Him. Above all...just keep praying that God will continually direct you and that you will continually be open to wherever God is leading you!

So, if you feel God might be calling you to monastic life at Subiaco, then contact Brother Ambrose to speak further. Stop by and spend some time with us to see if God might be calling you to become a monk at Subiaco Abbey. We would be honored to chat with you!